Future thoughts, wishes & plans 

“Nothing is impossible. The word says itself: I’m POSSIBLE.” – Audrey Hepburn



Good evening! 

Today I woke up at 8, that’s late for being me but I was up until midnight yesterday, talking to my friends… missing them all too much! 

Mom & I left for physio around 10.30 am, I started 11.30 and it was scheduled for 3 hours. The first hour was more of a relaxed session, mindfulness & so on, the second one was with another physiotherapist- where we especially worked on making both shoulder blades equal. The right shoulder blade stands out more because of the scoliosis. I will never completely get rid of the curve in the middle of my spine, but I will be able to work on exercises to decrease the effects that it has on my body. I’ve been shown stretches and strengthening exercises for this, as well for my glutes, core & abdominal muscles.

So, what are my future plans for the moment…? Well, the director of taZ explained me that since the contract was taken back, I have to redo the audition in March, to start in August 2017. This sounds absolutely reasonable, I get that they have rules they need to follow. Of course I do wish that they would have been able to take me back just next semester… Unfortunately not. Right now, I am only working towards getting better in my back. To get strong, fit & ready to push my body to the most in dance. Until Christmas, I’ll do physio, work myself and with my ballet friend here (how amazing is it that she’s here in Delhi as well? I couldn’t be more thankful for that).

What will I do for next semester then, after Christmas…? Well, this is my everyday question to myself as well. I have two relatively OK options;

1. Stay in India, study the Swedish high school on distance (economics). It will give me lots of time to work with physio & with my ballet friend. Aim for competitions & strengthening my body in every way.

2. Go to an academic boarding school in Sweden. They would help me do the whole first year’s course in only a few months, that means I won’t be behind in the academics at all. I would study the economy program in English. Swedish is my mother tongue but I speak both languages on a daily basis. I am honestly more convenient with writing, talking & reading in english, weird…? The boarding school has a lot of students who practise sports on professional levels, which means that they understand the importance of “work insane or remain the same”– fact. There are even studios at the school which I can use, I have amazing teachers in Sweden, as well, whom I know would help me, do class, rehearse, pointe & so on.

I still have time to decided what to do. If I get in to taZ again, I’m totally fine with redoing one year. I know I have potential & a good body for ballet, but I am also absolutely aware that I need time & strength to get things into my body. Redoing one year would give me more experiences, more strength & a whole lot of motivation. I will also audition to other schools, to have (emergency) options.

I miss ballet so much & by finishing high school, I know I could always go back to studying, in case my back would decide to ruin it all again.

It’s only 15 days until I leave for Zurich. Sadly, it’s not because I will go to the school, I might have a meeting there or so, but the purpose of the trip is ((getting out from India)) visiting my beloved friends there. ❤ After Zurich I am travelling to Sweden, I’ll be in some different cities there. Actually I will also spend some days at the boarding school, they have their “trial period” by then. If I choose to start there next semester, I can probably get some books already then, to start reading & preparing for the upcoming studies. I miss & love studying!

So, these were my plans. I’ve kept it from you for quite some time, to think everything through more, before I tell you something. This is my life right now. I wish it would have been exactly the opposite: me, healthy & strong dancing in Zurich… sometimes life comes with a lot of challenges, but I shouldn’t complain- that’s what makes you strong!

Enjoy your weekend! Thank God it’s Friday? 


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